Heartbroken

Hi everyone,

Today I write cause I need it I think...I need to talk about it and what a better place than my own blog? Be aware it will be not a happy post.

Last month I met a man and we got along well immediately. We talked a lot everyday and we had fun together...we didn't promise each other anything, and it was just cool. Every morning and every night I was waiting for his little text and couldn't wait to talk with him after work....It was great to have someone who cared about me, someone who made me feel desire and beautiful. He made me forget the bad things that happened in my life and you see it was fun. 

But two weeks ago, he started to desappear from my life...I was worried cause I didn't have any news. And last sunday I had some news. He confessed to me that in reality he was married and didn't know how to tell me. He desappeared cause he felt guilty to have lied to me. He asked me to forgive him, and I did...I mean I'm not happy to have been his mistress and to have been lied to, but I like him and I didn't want to lose him. We talked a little bit about why he had lied and why he cheats his wife. I'm not proud to be the dirty little secret of a man, but I can't control my heart.

Yesterday night he told me he couldn't talk to me anymore, cause he felt too much guilty. I understand, seriously I understand, but it doesn't mean it's less painful. I'm not sure I was in love with him, but for sure I like him a lot. He was the first man to make me feel really beautiful and he was nice...and even if he lied to me, I know he is a good man.


It's not in my nature to complain, but I needed to talk about it. I miss him, I miss talking to him...and even if you think that I'm a bad person cause I was the mistress I can't help how I feel. It had been a long time since my heart had been broken, and I didn't miss it at all. Now I question myself a lot..and I wonder simply when will I find love? I'll be 26 soon and I just want to find someone with whom I'll be comfortable and happy, is it too much to ask?

Ok I think I'll stop there, I complained enough and I'm sure you all have your own problems, doesn't need to read mind. 

Thank you to be there...I love you all